2019: A Year in Review - Part I: Year Overview

I had tried starting this post before the coronavirus outbreak, but did not get any progress until now.  It's April 11, 2020 and I've been home since before March Break, which would make this the start of week #5.  Not sure if this is affecting anyone else, but I feel especially lethargic from a work perspective, having to stay home all the time.  But I will push through this lethargy and complete this post today!  If you see this on April 11, you'll know I succeeded!

In general, 2019 was somewhat eventful, but it really went by like a blur and nothing stuck out as a highlight.  Perhaps it wasn't the greatest of years as you'll soon read about.  Or maybe, it might be because I didn't have any newborn this year! ;)  But I'm glad I'm going through this exercise of looking back.  Otherwise, the year would have passed and I would not have reflected more upon it.  And isn't being conscious and being able to reflect on past events what separates us from other creatures in this world?

Annual Tradition - Gambling & Eating Steak

This has become a bit of an annual tradition.  It started way back in 2008 (?) when the Great Recession was running in high gear and it seemed like everything was on discount.  Hotels were not the least affected and had some pretty great deals that winter.  Kelvin (Lai Chuen), my cousin and I would enjoy the packaged deals from Four Points Fallsview to stay for a night, get some "free" chips from the casino and coupons from local restaurants (which lowered the cost of the highly priced food back to normal prices).

Isn't gambling not allowed for Catholics?  Well, no, that is not entirely accurate.  Gambling, in and of itself, is not a sin.  However, gambling definitely leads to sin; which is why gambling is often shunned.  I know this first hand.  Many years ago, I lost around $200 at a casino and I lost it and threw a fit like an uncontrollable toddler.  It was an ugly sight.  $200 is not a huge amount but it was enough to turn me into a different person.  "Know your limit" so goes the OLG saying.  Now, I know my limit!  So these days, I get the "free" chips from the casino and play enough so I can cash it out.

Anyway, back to our trip to Niagara.  Kelvin's birthday is in January.  So, we decided to take advantage of the hotel deals again.  But this time, I had a few surprises for him.  I picked up the tab for his stay and even organized a surprise for him.  He thought that it was only the 2 of us + family, but there ended up being around 20 people, including my parents, his in-laws, Jit team.  It was a fun trip...and to spoil next year's "2020 in Review" post, we did it again in January 2020!


Selling the Matrix

This section is quite inconsequential...but thought I'd document this for posterity.  Lol.  Just before Renee and I got married, we bought our first car together.  It was a used 2004 Toyota Matrix.  Over the years, it had served us well.  When we went down to one car after Adele was born, we gave it to my dad to drive.  He eventually got a BMW and passed the Matrix to my mom.  My mom then drove it for probably 6 or 7 years.  Finally, after 15 years of good service and almost 300,000 km, we decided to retire it.  I think we even sold it for $1200 (if I recall correctly).  It was such a practical and reliable car!  It had not broken down once and all repairs were of a minor nature.

For this, I love Toyotas so much!  They're just engineered and manufactured so well and last forever.  However, I'm terribly worried about the company.  They are like Blackberry in 2008...not quite sure what I mean?  Well, the iPhone was announced in 2007.  Everyone knew it was the future, but people like Steve Ballmer just mocked it (you gotta click on this link if you haven't seen the video).  I think you know where I'm going with this.  We know electric vehicles (EVs) are the future.  How can they not be?  But Toyota is just so obstinate!  I don't get it.  They practically started the EV revolution by pioneering hybrid technology.  Why do they have such a pathetic EV roadmap?  When they talk the game, what they mean by EVs are hybrids, and not zero-emissions EVs.  This would have been fine 20 years ago when they came out with the Prius.  They've gone from leader to laggard.  It's truly disappointing and sad.


Mom's Surgery
My mom, Susanna, has been my nanny, cook, educator, and Instacart shopper (lol, this last one is a joke) for the past 10 years.  I'm tremendously grateful for her help.  Without her, I don't think we could have gone past 2 kids!

Last year, she was diagnosed with breast cancer.  It was actually not her first diagnosis of this terrible disease.  10 years prior, she was diagnosed with the same and had her first mastectomy.  Her recovery back then was not great.  I recall it probably took her about a week before she was able to get out of bed.  Even then, she was not very mobile.  So, this time, we were very worried about what this would mean.  She was going to get another mastectomy, but she was now 10 years older.

To our surprise, while she had the same surgeon and had the surgery done at the same hospital, the surgery went exceptionally well.  She was also able to have a one-night stay at the hospital instead of a day surgery.  That helped tremendously as well.  By day 3, she was up and about and even cooked lunch (nobody can stop her when she's determined)!  We were really relieved!  She fully recovered in 2 to 3 months.  It's been over a year since the surgery and she's been back to her old self.  Thanks be to God!

We also thank you all for your prayers and kind thoughts during this time!

It is important to note...while mom was off on sick leave, Renee did a great job taking care of kids and myself.  She did lose about 5 pounds in this period though! :P


Grandma's Passing and Trip to Hong Kong
In mid April, mom called and told us that she was well enough to come back the following week.  We didn't mind that she took more time off to recuperate but knowing mom, she probably felt it was her responsibility to come back to help when she was able.  That's mom...always going above and beyond!

As fate would have it, on the following day, she got a call from my uncle in Hong Kong informing her that Grandma had been hospitalized.  The situation was not good and so, she booked her flight to go back.  I followed shortly after.  I was glad I did because Grandma passed while I was there and I got to spend her last few days with her.  I wrote about that last year when I was still in Hong Kong.

Not only was I able to spend time with Grandma, I also spent some time with my cousins, whom I had not seen in quite some time.  In fact, it was really my first time interacting on a less superficial basis with my younger cousins, Ka Yue and Ka Pong.  They were born after we had immigrated to Canada and I was glad I was able to get to know them a bit better.  Guys, if you're reading, thanks for your hospitality last year.  It was great connecting with you guys!  I was also fortunate to connect with a few other relatives and old friends, which is always great.  It was too bad I was only there for 1 week...

This trip was also the only time I spent any meaningful amount of time alone with mom.  The last time was probably in 1989 when again, the two of us went to Hong Kong together (wow, some 30 years ago)!  After grandma's passing, we did some touristy stuff in Hong Kong, went shopping, and enjoyed the rest of our time there.  I guess this was the silver lining of the trip.

Family's First Baseball Game

Ainsworth's (where I work) family event this year was a Blue Jays game.  It's been about 30 years since I've seen a live Jays game.  The last time, the Rogers Centre was still called the Skydome (which is what I still call it).  It was a superb game to watch with something like 7 home runs during the game!  Free game, free food - what a great day!  Thanks Ainsworth!


Enjoying Friends' Company
Honestly, God has blessed us with so many good friends that we're so grateful.  I have to say I'm terrible with keeping in touch.  It's never been my strength.  Thanks to all you kind souls; that hasn't kept you out of our lives!

One wintry day, we had a great time with Matt, Jessica, Sophia and Sam at the Science Centre!  They gifted us a membership many years ago and after losing it for a few years, we finally found it.  We gladly invited them to join us.  It was a bit of a hectic and chaotic day, with adults terribly outnumbered (mainly my fault), but we had a blast!

And for all those of you who don't know, the Science Centre has a great reciprocal membership program with other museums.  Within a 8 hour drive radius, you probably have free access to around 10 different museums in Canada and the US.  Definitely keep this in mind!

In 2019, I was also a godfather again!  I'm the proud godfather of everyone in John's family except Joanna!  Their second, Oliver, was baptized and I was so honoured to be godfather again!  Godfather Part III...lol!

In July, we threw Matt (Tsang) a surprise birthday lunch.  The surprise was so good...Matt Siu and I hid in Lai Chuen's pantry and when Matt came over, thinking he was putting up some furniture for Lai Chuen, we scared the heck out of him when he found 2 screaming dudes in the pantry!  We definitely had a good laugh at his expense!

Calvin, Aggie, and their girls Abbey and Alley visited from Hong Kong in December.  We had a great time reminiscing about old jokes like "I...I...I was just saying..."  It was a great way of celebrating Christmas with great, old friends!  Watching Dennis and Calvin shuck oysters was also amusing! :)

Other Highlights

Watching Canada Day Fireworks at the Local Park 

Renee's Grandma Visiting in the Summer 

Starting of a New Family Tradition: A Real Christmas Tree!

Thanks for dropping by!  Stay tuned for more!

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Goodbye, 阿婆 (Grandma)!

A few of you know that I'm currently in Hong Kong to say my last goodbye to my grandmother. She passed away on May 2.  This post is part trip journal and part tribute to her.

阿婆 On Our Wedding Day, August 5, 2006

April 28, 2019
I'm 30,000 ft in the air as I write this, on my way to Hong Kong. My maternal grandmother is in palliative care right now in Our Lady of Maryknoll Hospital in Wong Tai Sin, Kowloon.  Her health has been in steady decline since she lost her ability to walk about 7 years ago, and started living in a geriatric home.  She was diagnosed with breast cancer about 11 years ago and had a mastectomy.  The cancer eventually spread to her bones and liver.


Memories from My Childhood
When I was a small child still living in Hong Kong, my parents would drop me off at pre-school, and later on, elementary school, and 阿婆 would pick me up at the end of the school day. I would then spend the afternoon with her until my mother came to pick me up after work. Those afternoons with her make up one my fondest memories of my childhood.

Before she moved to a more modern day apartment, she lived in one of the first public housing projects built in Hong Kong, in today's Lok Fu in Kowloon, which was also where my mother grew up. Her unit (#503 of block 17) was a small rectangular unit with no rooms, kitchen (she had a stove in the hallway/balcony outside), or washroom (a shared washroom was present on each floor), and was no larger than 200 square feet. Her entire family of 5 lived there for many years.  Life there was difficult, but also very interesting.

阿婆 loved playing mahjong, and in many afternoons, she used to play for several hours with me sleeping on her lap. I still have memories of curling up on her lap, looking at the bottom of the mahjong table and listening to the noise of shuffling mahjong.


Life Lessons
Throughout those formative years with her, I learned a number of life lessons.  One of the most vivid memories I had with her happened when I must have been around six or seven years old.  Hearing profanity at that time for me was not uncommon, except I had no concept of profanity.  No one told me that a certain word was a bad word, and so, one day as we were standing near the bus stop where my mom would get off to pick me up, I uttered some profanity in front of 阿婆, not really understanding what I had said. Immediately, her face changed and asked me where I had learned that particular word.  She then went on to give me a lecture on how only rude people would say those words.  I remember feeling horrible and more importantly, learned that one could get into much trouble by inadvertently saying something that wasn't appropriate.  I can't say that I never curse, but I hope most people will agree with me that only during intense moments do profanity come out of my mouth.

She also taught me, through her way of living, that it was ok to enjoy the little things in life.  I remember particularly enjoying cooking instant noodles on a kerosene stove with her, inside her little unit (recall that she had no kitchen inside).  From the lighting of the match, to the sweet smell of burning kerosene, to the wonderful taste of Nissin instant ramen, I loved every moment of this humble life.  To the chagrin of my parents, my afternoon life was often filled with cartoons and less-than-healthy snacks.  I would often get into trouble when my little stomach had been filled with snacks and wouldn't allow for much dinner shortly afterwards.  Now, as a parent, when my kids wouldn't eat at dinner, my first question to Renee or my mother would be, "Did they just have snacks?"

Public Housing in Lo Fu Ngam, Kowloon (circa 1960s)

As you can see in the picture above, the resettlement blocks (as they're called) had long balconies.  阿婆 lived on the sixth floor (don't ask me why the unit number was 503!) and we used to stand at the balcony, look down below and people watch.  One of the most anticipated moments of the day was when the 飛機欖 (an olive based snack) seller came by.  The name 飛機欖 literally means "airplane olive", and why it was called "airplane" was the way it was delivered.  The seller usually had a trumpet and when he came by, he would play it to alert the neighborhood, much like how ice-cream trucks play music in North America.  Kids like myself would then race to the balconies and throw coins down the balcony.  Once he received the money, he would then throw the 飛機欖 up to your floor.  As you can imagine, I loved this whole interaction.  However, I never quite acquired the taste of the 飛機欖 itself.

Another yummy food that used to be sold by street vendors in the neighborhood was 砵仔糕. Mmm....so yummy!  This post is making me hungry!

Now that I am reflecting on this, I realize it has shaped my own way of parenting quite a bit.  Whenever I have a 1-on-1 date with one of our kids, bringing them to Tim Hortons or McDonald's is almost a sure thing.  Perhaps when they're grown, they will remember fondly these little joyful moments with their father.


WWII Stories
In the years leading up to World War II, the Japanese occupied Guangzhou where she lived.  As a young girl, she had learned how to speak Japanese.  I believe she picked it up through working for either a Japanese family or company.  Although she was a bit rusty, she was still able to converse in Japanese well into her seventies.  My favourite dish that she made was Japanese omelette wrapped fried rice.  Although she had never taught me how to make it, I had watched her cook it many a time.  I'm not super great at it, but it is something I can make to impress my guests (or so I think)!  I remember that one year when she was visiting Canada, I surprised her by making the dish for her.  I was expecting her to say, "Oh, you did a good job making the fried rice even though I hadn't taught you."  Instead, what I got was, "The egg is kind of...thick.  Make it thinner next time."  That was a LOL moment!

Omelette Fried Rice Made by Me

The following is a story I like to tell my Canadian friends and it absolutely blows their minds.  If you had met her in her 70s and early 80s, you would agree she looked like one of those typical cute, old Chinese ladies - short in stature, a bit chubby, and has a nice permed hairdo.

Grandma at Adele's Baptism

I've been told when she was much younger and not yet married that she was very attractive.  This did not go unnoticed by a Japanese military personnel stationed where she was living.  Whether he was a lowly ranked soldier or a general is unknown to me, but it would seem that this was not a situation a young woman would want to be in during that time.  She learned that he would come by to where she lived and ask about her.  At that time, my grandfather was married to her older half sister (different mother).  After some discussion with her sister, my grandfather proposed that he marry 阿婆 as well, which would serve as protection for her.  Her attractiveness, I imagine, did not make this proposal a difficult one for my grandfather!  So, 阿婆 became my grandfather's third, simultaneous wife.

Grandma Holding Baby Uncle 志堃 (circa 1948)

This notion of polygamy seems unthinkable now, but if one looks into history, strict monogamy is taught by few religions except Christianity.  As the Western world moves away from its Christian roots, we are now seeing polygamy making a come back, at least in the form of serial polygamy (divorce and remarriage).  I can certainly see polygamy as a next frontier in the ongoing sexual revolution society has been undergoing since the 1960s.


May 1, 2019
Today is May 1, 2019.  It's 10:10 am in the morning Hong Kong time. 阿婆's condition has declined significantly since yesterday morning.  She was very alert and aware yesterday.  When we arrived at the hospital in the morning, she was already awake and stayed that way for a couple of hours. Mom fed her some liquid formula and she enjoyed it. She even managed to look at us and smile.  It was a comforting sight.

Then, at around noon, congee was delivered to the room and Mom tried to feed it to her. Since it was fairly thick, and 阿婆 wasn't able to really swallow, we added some water into her mouth.  That, however, was not such a good idea.  Since she had trouble with swallowing, the congee likely went into her windpipe instead of her esophagus.  She then had some trouble breathing and so, we asked the nurse to try sucking what sounded like phlegm, but was actually the congee, from her throat.  It helped a bit, but since this episode, her condition worsened drastically.  When the nurse came in to do a checkup, she wasn't able to measure her blood oxygen levels.  So, she put an oxygen mask on 阿婆 and turned the oxygen supply to the maximum setting.  The nurse also asked us to call all of our family as things did not look well.

By late afternoon, all immediate family was at the hospital.  My cousin, Ka Pong, who was away in Taiwan, also made it back to see 阿婆.  Renee and the kids also spoke with 阿婆 through the phone, as did my brother Eric and Joanne, his wife.  We all thought that 阿婆 was waiting for everyone to show up before passing on.  However, she did end up surviving the night.


May 3, 2019
阿婆's Last Day
After a quiet day on May 1, Mom and I went back to the hospital on May 2 at around 8:30 am.  When we got there, 阿婆 was awake and fairly alert.  We talked with her and she was sometimes able to respond by nodding or shaking her head.  However, her eyes had that glazed look that wasn't present a few days before.  Since it was just ourselves there at the hospital, we took it easy and relaxed in the hospital room.  Mom then remembered that my dad had not spoken to 阿婆 and asked me to call him.  We put him on the phone and he had quite a funny chat with her, reminiscing the days when they played mahjong with Uncle Paul and Auntie Loretta (Eric's in laws).  When he finished speaking with her, I walked outside and continued chatting with him while Mom stayed inside the room.  After about 5 minutes, Mom came out with a worried look and asked me to go into the room.  When I got there, I saw 阿婆 with an anxious look in her eyes and her mouth opened and shut repeatedly.  We had not seen that in the past few days.  I immediately called my uncle, 志堃, and my cousin Cindy.  Fortunately, Uncle 志堃 was already on his way to the hospital.  Within minutes, he arrived.  阿婆 continued to struggle and at last, closed her eyes and stopped breathing.

I went out to call the nurse and she came in.  She told us that 阿婆 still had a pulse and asked us to get as many family members here as possible.  At around 10:50 am, her pulse had stopped.  The doctor examined her about an hour later and her official time of death was 12:12 pm on May 2, 2019.  The cause of death was pneumonia.  She was 92 years old.

Farewell...But Not For Long
On Sunday, I will be flying back to Toronto.  I feel that this is one of the most important trips I had taken in my life.  My cousin Kelvin (on my father's side) gave me some really good advice when I was still deciding on whether to come back or not.  He said, "人生是一條減數 (Life is a subtraction)."  He recently lost his father and wanted to remind me that as we are past our mid-life, our losses in this life will continue to increase.  So, I thank him for putting things into perspective for me, which allowed me to make the right decision.  I do agree that that is the sad truth that we must all face.  However, I don't believe our bodily deaths are the end of our existence.  It is merely a transition to something greater.

So, 阿婆, farewell...but not for long.  In the face of eternity, what is another 30 to 50 years?  We'll meet again soon enough!

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2018: A Year in Review - Part I

Hope You Had a Merry Christmas!

It seems like I've settled on writing once every few months, and sometimes in bursts. Life, as a father of five, as you can imagine, is busy, but that's no excuse for not getting things done. As the saying goes, "if you want to get something done, ask a busy person." (It is with great pride to say that people often ask me to do things for them.)  Prioritizing and extreme focus are keys to achieving goals in a busy environment. However, I sometimes lack either or both. So, while it has been an eventful year, I wish I had been more successful in doing the two things above.

This post has been greatly inspired by our friend, Stella, who has been very religious in sending us an annual update of their family during the Christmas season. I love reading them and thought it'd be a good idea to do something of my own here.  I hope you will enjoy this long one!

Let's start with the kids, shall we?

Amelia Was Born

Merry Christmas Everyone!

Of course, the biggest event of 2018 was the birth of Amelia in January!  She has been a wonderfully easy baby. Either that or we've gotten into the groove by now... Or probably both! :)  Her older siblings adore her and are so helpful in keeping an occasional eye on her while we cook, clean, etc.

Amelia is a happy baby. Anytime anyone speaks to her, a glowing smile would appear on her face and she would get so excited. She has been saying "mama" and "baba" for quite some time now. Also being very mobile, she's crawling and cruising everywhere and putting anything that's in her path into her mouth! Yikes!


Cutie Pie Anne

Look at Those Big Round Eyes! <3

Anne just turned 3 in January and has developed quite a vocabulary. She's pretty much fully bilingual now, but is still a bit more proficient in Cantonese. Our favourite phrase that she would say, when she can't find a book she's looking for, is "Perhaps Daddy donated it (可能爸爸捐咗)."  We couldn't stop laughing.  She said this because I'm constantly asking the kids to pick out some of the 2000 books they own to donate.  It's so cute to hear her speak in very coherent sentences.  When we went to take pictures with Santa, Santa asked her, "and what would you like for Christmas?"  As she shyly looked at him with her big round eyes, I wondered if she knew what he was asking. To my surprise, she answered with a short and sweet, "Princess!" I chuckled softly at that.


Audrey the Mischievous Girly Girl

In Front of Cinderella's Castle

Audrey is in SK this year. She's now able to read simple Seussian sentences like, "The hat is on the cat."  She started school as a very quiet student but now has warmed up in class. Being the middle child, she's very dramatic at times. She's a girly girl and wants to wear dresses all the time. She's also gotten the artistic genes from mommy and likes to draw.  Just last weekend, she received 2nd place in a colouring contest at Chinese Martyrs.  I feel like she'll grow up to be the girl that everyone wants to hang out with, because of her fun loving nature.


Athan the Maturing Young Man

His Tastes are Definitely Grown Up!

Athan has matured quite a bit. When he was 3 and was going to Montessori, the teacher once sent home a letter complaining how he would not listen in class and can't seem to keep his hands to himself. We were very worried and continued to worry about him until his SK year.  It has been a gradual but very visible turn for the better. He even got the All Round Performance award in his class last year! This year, he started piano and is enjoying it so far.  The most impressive thing is that he's often the first to wake up by himself on a school day, gets dressed and finishes breakfast before mommy is even out of bed (although the motivation is to play video games before leaving for school '-_- ).  We're really happy with his progress!


Adele the Big Sister

Little Young Lady

Without a doubt, Adele is the big sister.  She is super responsible and is always helpful.  "Adele, can you get your sister buckled?...Adele, can you look after Amelia for a minute?...Adele, can you brush Anne's teeth?"  These are often our requests and she would have no problem helping us.  We're so thankful for her help.

This winter, she got interested in Harry Potter and have been reading the set of books.  She has now far exceeded our reading speed, plowing through the 800-page novel in a day...how is that even possible??  Many parents want to encourage their kids to read more, but we're faced with the problem of Adele reading too much!  She would even walk up the stairs very slowly while reading a novel!  I recall when I was still doing my Master of Theological Studies at U of T that I struggled with all of the reading assignments.  Each week, we would be assigned hundreds of pages of readings and on top of that, write pages of reflections.  I'm sure she will be more like my fellow students, who had no issue with the readings, than me, who struggled to read half of the assigned readings!


Trip to Orlando

In September, just a week after school started, we took a week off to go to Orlando.  Why in the middle of September after school started?  Well, earlier I met up with my old boss, Michael, from ATS, and he told me about how he brought his wife and 7 kids (!!) to Orlando the week after school started and it was awesome.  If that man can recommend going the week after the start of school, who am I to question his wisdom!?!

Indeed, we had an awesome time.  Since September was still Hurricane season and school had just started, the crowds were so much smaller than at other times.  The longest line that we waited in was an hour at Space Mountain.  All other lines were under 45 minutes and sometimes, none at all, when using Fast Passes.  And in terms of weather - perfect!  The days were hot, but surely not as hot as in July and August, and it only rained for about 30 minutes the entire time we were there.  We did get a bit anxious seeing Hurricane Florence just miss Florida and made landing in the Carolinas instead.  But speaking with locals, they say that Orlando is actually very well situated; most hurricanes land either north or south of the area, which may be why Disney World and other attractions were built here.

Anyway, we won't go into too much detail about Disney or Universal here...but I did want to talk about how we got there.  I had been watching airfares for a better part of the year and was recently made aware of Frontier Airlines, which is a budget airline that flies mainly in the US.  There were some fairly good deals throughout the year, but for this trip, I found one that was simply unbeatable.  My first choice was to fly out of Buffalo for obvious reasons, but the flights were still not as cheap as I'd like them to be.  I then increased my search radius and that gave me 3 more airports to search from: Detroit, Cleveland, and Pittsburgh, all of which were about 4-6 hours drive away.  Then I found it, the impossible fare!  I found a direct flight from Pittsburgh to Orlando for $40 USD round trip!  With luggage, we ended up paying $350 USD for the entire family - 7 human beings!  To top that off, my travel credit card gave me a rebate of $100 CAD for luggage fees.  In the end, we paid about $60 CAD per person.  So, go ahead and visit Frontier Airlines and send me a cheque for all the money you're going to save!

Lastly, here's a super funny video of "Meet the Raptor" attraction at Islands of Adventure.  It was so well done!

Meet the Raptor at Universal's Islands of Adventure

Surf's Up!

Battling Darth Vader at Hollywood Studios

Seuss Landing at Islands of Adventure

Fireworks Were Worth Staying Late For!

My Favourite Attraction: Meeting Princesses!

Swimming at Resort

In Pittsburgh Just Before Flying Out

Stay Tuned!
There's much more to 2018!  Stay tuned!

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Thank YOU!! Keep It Coming! It's Our Last Day!

Thanks to all you generous folks, you know who you are, we have raised $1980!  Today is our last day to raise funds for the school!  It does take a village to raise a child...and in our case, 5 children!  So, it takes a Metropolis to raise ours!  We're grateful for your generosity!

Click here to sponsor us!

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Why I Run (and Why You Should Give Us Some Money)!

Results of Last Year's Half Marathon 

Last year, I ran my first half marathon.  Relatively speaking, I was pretty slow, but I finished and didn't walk!  My goal for last year was to run a sub 2-hr half marathon, but I clocked in at 2:22 in the Scotiabank Toronto Marathon.  It was a challenging year for me last year as work had, and continues to, take over a good chunk of my time.  Including the drive, I'm easily clocking 12  to 13 hours a day.  Not complaining, but just putting some context (or making up an excuse) around this narrative...but this is not what we're talking about today.

Exercise and Me
What I want to talk about is the reason for me to run.  I have never been a runner.  The last organized race before the half marathon that I participated in was when I ran a 2 km cross country race in Grade 5!  I wouldn't say I wasn't an active person, however.  As a kid, I rode my bike everywhere, 365 days a year.  I had mastered the art of jumping off a bike and landing safely when I slipped on black ice.  It wasn't that I loved riding bicycles, but rather, it was out of necessity.  I had a paper route and as part of that job, I had to go to my customers to collect the paper money.  Riding a bike was way better than walking.

Growing up, I had trained in Karate for about 10 years, and so, was in relatively good shape.  Then university happened and things just kind of went downhill there.  I never really got fat, but was just not in great shape.  Two years ago, I attended a conference in San Francisco with Meredith, one of my staff, and on our last day there, we had a morning to sight see before our flight back.  She suggested that we rent a bike to see the Golden Gate Bridge and other parts of the city.  I wasn't thrilled about the idea especially when SF is a very hilly city.  It turned out to be a very difficult bike ride because it was either very hilly or very windy by the sea.  Meredith did just fine, but I was dying trying to catch up to her.

My Father-in-Law Johnson
When I first started dating Renee, I learned that her father, Johnson, runs the half marathon each year.  At that time, he was in his 50s and I was so impressed.  Eventually, his knee (like mine) would complain and he gave it up for less impactful activity.  I've never told him this, but a big part of what made me want to run a half marathon was seeing him do it year after year!  Great job, Dad!

So Why Did I Start Running?
As a lot of you were so generous in past years, you know that at least part of the reason for me to run is to raise funds for my kids' school.  I figured that to get you to part with your money, I had to give you a pretty good reason to do it.  Subjecting myself to unnecessary pain would probably not be a bad idea.  The year before last, I shaved my head to achieve that goal.  This coming Saturday, June 9, we will be doing a 5 km walk with the school while praying 5 x 5 decades of rosary.  I don't know, but I think the latter might actually be more difficult for the kids (and perhaps adults)!  I will also be doing a half marathon this fall, aiming to do it under 2 hours as I mentioned above.

There is, however, a deeper reason to my running.  It has to do with conditioning myself mentally.  For what?  I don't quite know.  I do know that pretty much half my life is now in the past, and while I've accomplished some things in life (marrying a wonderful woman and having 5 beautiful kids), I feel a calling to do more.  It's that primordial human desire to achieve more.

Over the years, I've come to understand better how to discern God's calling.  There are literally an infinite number of ways that one can live out one's life, but there are only a few, or maybe just one way that God is calling you to live.  How does God do that?  I don't think it comes from a booming voice from heaven, nor through visions like those experienced by St. Teresa of Avila.  Rather, it often comes as a deep and recurring desire and feeling that one has.  I was originally going to spend some time talking about my experience discerning the will of God, but that turned out to be a rather long-winded post. I will leave that for my next post!  What I want to say is that there is a deep desire within myself to make a greater impact to those around me.

I also recall one of my favourite verses from the Parable of the Talents: "Well done, my good and faithful servant. Since you were faithful in small matters, I will give you great responsibilities. Come, share your master’s joy" (Matthew 25:23).  In the same way, running for me is the "small matter".  There's nothing complicated about running, if you put in the time and effort to train, you will get faster and run farther.  It is as simple as that.  While simple, it is not easy.  However, if I cannot achieve even a simple task as setting aside time to train for a half marathon, how will I be able to achieve greater things?

So running is the beginning.  If I can't make a simple physical sacrifice, how can I make greater sacrifices for my family?  If I can't bear physical discomfort, how can I  be prepared for greater trials?  Therefore, conquering the 21.1 km is the first milestone of the second half of my life journey.  Hope you can be part of it!

Thank You for Your Generosity!
And so, I'd like to thank those who have helped in the past for your generosity.  You are "stor(ing) treasures in heaven!" (Matthew 6:20).  I humbly ask for your help again!

Perhaps you have other reasons to contribute to our campaign...Perhaps you're also a parent and you know the lengths you would go to make your kids' lives better.  Well, that's me doing that right now! :)

And perhaps you've enjoyed reading my blog posts.  My more popular posts have gotten upwards of 700 pageviews!  I'm grateful for your readership!

Our Family Thanks You from the Bottom of Our Hearts!

Wait!  The Government is Matching Your Donation!
Ok, so no, they're not matching your donations, but you can think of it this way: when you donate, say, $100.  You will get a tax receipt.  When tax time comes around, that tax receipt can get you close to 40% of your donation in tax credits.  So, in effect, when you donate $100, it's like donating $60, with the government "matching" it with $40 of their money!  Free money, who doesn't want that!!

So, please help us walk 5 km with 5 kids, saying 5 decades of rosary 5 times!  Our fundraising goal is $3000.

Click here to sponsor us!  

Again, thank you so much for your generosity!  God bless!

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Hello World! I'm A5!

Hello World!  Renee and I are pleased to introduce to you our newest addition in the making!  We and the kids are super excited and can't wait to meet little A5!  She is due January 24th, 2018.  We just went for the 20-week ultrasound yesterday and yes, it will be our 4th girl!  Athan was a little disappointed that he wasnt going to have a littel brother, but Audrey was very pleased! Lol!

Grandma (my mom, Susanna) said, after Anne was born, that if we have a 5th, she would quit (佢話佢唔撈)!  But so far, she seems to be quite pleased as well!  Lol!  I guess we don't have to make any decision quite yet, but Renee turning into a stay home mom is quite possible.  Perhaps a hiatus from work for a few years, until all kids are in school, would make sense.

I've always thought that Renee's artistic talents are somewhat going to waste...so if she does stay home, I will be encouraging her to paint regularly and sell her paintings.

A Car Has 5 Seats
When we had 3 kids, I remember thinking to myself that it was quite nice to have 3 kids and it was because of a very silly thing: seating in a car.  We wouldn't need a minivan if we only had 3 kids.  So, now that we have 4 kids and a 8-seater minivan, I always joke to whoever asks how many we're going to have that we can now have 6 kids!

Further, here's another idea.  I've got a Tesla Model 3 reservation, and in a year or so, I should be getting it.  It's eventually going to be capable of self-driving, which means I actually have 8 + 5 seats.  I can be driving the van and the Model 3 can be following from behind (or in front)!  13 seats = 2 of us + 11 kids?!  LOL.  Ok, that I'm really kidding!

After 3, It's All the Same
One thing that I also get asked is, "People say that after 3 kids, it's the same amount of work.  Is it true?"  So, for the record the answer is....yes and no!  Is it the same amount of work when you have 4 versus 3...no, there is more work (for sure).  Unless your oldest is a teen and is super helpful, being able to take the load off you, there will be more work.  However, the experience that you have is that it is not more work.  Why is that?  It is because that the incremental amount of work becomes less.  Going from no kids to 1 kid is the biggest change, but going from 3 kids to 4 is at most a 33% increase.  Furthermore, it's now your 4th kid, it's safe to assume that you've learned a thing or two about taking care of kids.  Lastly, your "care" level with your 4th kid inevitably drops as well (sorry, Anne!).  When your first picks up a piece of dirt and puts it in her mouth, you go crazy, but when your fourth does the same...oh well, she'll spit it out on her own.

So, in absolute terms, yes, it's more work, but experientially, you could say it's the same...or even paradoxically less?!  For you considering having more, go for it.  "After three, it's all the same"....except the happiness you have increases exponentially!  We, as a society, need to see kids as a source of joy rather than a burden.

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Life's Inspiration

Interview of Elon Musk at Code Conference 2016

When I wrote my post about my New Year Resolution, I mentioned that I had just listened to the audiobook of Elon Musk's biography.  Before reading the biography, I was vaguely familiar with this CEO of Tesla and SpaceX, but didn't really know very much outside of that.  But having read the book, Musk has become my inspiration.  What he's doing for humanity is certainly no footnote...in fact, I would argue he has made a bigger impact in transitioning humanity from burning fossil fuels to using sustainable energy than any other one person.  However, that is not really why he inspires me so much.

How he truly inspires me is how he approaches life.  In the interview above (if you have the time, watch the whole thing!), about 13 minutes into it, he says, "Life can't be just about solving problems; there have to be things that are inspiring and exciting that make you glad to be alive."  I believe I'm the first person on the web to point out this quote specifically and hopefully, it'll be more widely circulated, because I think it's great.  Although I would have to say life is actually even more than just having inspiring and exciting things, I don't think it's too shabby from a secular perspective.  It's really about finding passion in the things that you do.

Ask yourself this, "In my work, am I just solving problems?  Or does my job inspire and excite me, and makes me glad to be alive?"  If the answer is "just solving problems", then maybe it's time to re-evaluate your career choices.  Throughout my not so long/short life, I've flip-flopped between the two ends of the spectrum.  On one end, work and career is really just a means to making a living; life is much more than that.  On the other end, work and career is a big part of my life and I should be doing what I'm passionate about.  I think I'm closer to the latter right now in my life.  It is true that without my faith, family, friends, etc., it wouldn't matter much what I'm doing, but at the same time, if I were stuck in a job I hated, that would be a fairly bad way to spend a quarter of my life.

Perhaps as I age and as my kids are starting to understand things of the world, I want them to be able to learn from me the value of hard work, to not be satisfied with status quo, and to know that they can do great things.  I'm still finding my way there and I pray that God grants me this wish.  I end with a quote from Pope Benedict XVI, "The world offers you comfort. But you were not made for comfort. You were made for greatness."

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We're Expecting!

Hello World!

We have started to inform our family and friends, but it's never official unless it's published on the Internet, right? Thanks be to God, we are expecting our fourth child!!  He/she will be due early January.  I'm writing this as I'm sitting at the Ultrasound clinic, waiting for my turn to see the little guy/gal inside mommy's tummy.

First or Last to Know

For all of the older three, we've found out what the gender was since Renee didn't want any surprises.  I wanted to keep it a surprise for Adele but Renee said to me, "You can either be the first or last to know, your choice."  I really didn't have a choice, did I?  Now, she wants to keep it as a surprise whereas I don't.  I have a feeling I  will have no choice again.  ...I'm now back home and the ultrasound technician said it was difficult to see between the legs...LOL!  So, it looks like it'll be a surprise after all.

Story Behind This Story

There is actually a story (well, there always is).  About half a year ago, we started discerning whether 3 was it.  So, we started praying, asking God for a sign. He was kind and gave me two signs.  The first one came from Father Terry Fay.  I had met Father Terry from my time doing my now abandoned Master of Theological Studies program at U of T (maybe when the kids are older, I'll resume).  He would occasionally say mass at Chinese Martyrs and I'd say hi to him every time.  One Sunday, he was there again, and when mass was over, he came over to say hi.  While Father Terry was asking how many kids I had now (and I said 3), fellow parishioner, Ricky, came by and said, "He should have more, right?"  Father Terry didn't even answer Ricky, turned to me and said, "Three is a sacred number," and walked away.  I was like, "no way...".

So, the unbeliever in me prayed to God that night and asked, "Lord, I'm not sure if that was a coincidence or not, but if it's not offending to you, please give me a second sign to confirm the first."  Then, a little while later, while Pope Francis was in the Philippines, I read this article, and it talked about how he didn't think Catholics needed to "breed like rabbits" and "said population experts advised three children per family."  Go read the article yourself...I don't make this stuff up!  Anyway, I was floored when I read it.  If these were not clear signs from God, I don't know what is!

Are Not You More Important Than They?

Well, as you already know, God has a sense of humour!  At first, both Renee and I were somewhat anxious.  My mom already helps out a lot with the kids, and it's definitely not an easy task.  She really is a super (grand) mom!  Would having a fourth mean Renee have to stay home?  It's not easy to get by with a single (or even double) income these days.  But it would be entirely unfair to just toss this burden at my mom.  She already drops off and picks up the kids to/from school and cooks.  So, after Renee's mat leave is over (still 16 months away from that), we're planning to enroll them in before/after school care.  Renee would drop them off in the morning and leave work late, where I would go to work early and pick them up after school.  I can probably take up more cooking duties as well since I'll be home with them early.  This summer has been a trial run (parents were in Hong Kong for a month), and honestly, it's not bad.  Or I might win the lottery sometime in the next 16 months and all will be fine!

This other thought did come to mind.  If Father Terry had said, "Four is a sacred number."  Or if Pope Francis had said "population experts advised four children per family," would I be as concerned or anxious?  Obviously now, having (at least) four kids is God's will, why am I anxious?  Just because I thought He said three doesn't change the fact that four is really what He wants.  I think I might have fallen prey to confirmation bias.  Perhaps I was looking for signs of "three" and ignored other signs telling me to have four kids.  So, naturally, when I heard "three", I  clung onto these "signs" and gave them more prominence than they had deserved.

All of this anxiety has actually passed and we're now very excited about our new addition.  The house will be crazy and that's all good.  In this day and age where people look at you like you're crazy when you have even just three kids, we will be "the light of the world. A city set on a mountain cannot be hidden" (Matthew 5:14).  I'm excited that we can be an example for the world that kids are wonderful and they are the greatest blessing that we can receive!

Look at the birds in the sky; they do not sow or reap, they gather nothing into barns, yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are not you more important than they? (Matthew 6:26)

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Family Trip to Cayo Coco, Cuba - Part 2 of 3

Renee at the Italian Restaurant by the Shore, Coconut in Hand

I'm now writing this in late April to late May (this post took a month to write!). *Sigh*  Sometimes I wished I was retired (don't we all?) and have all the free time to do things that we want to do.  I remember hearing from somewhere that when students are asked what they would do if they had a million dollars, the teacher would tell them that that particular thing is what they should become once they graduate.  To that question, I would say sleeping, spending time with my family, traveling, and blogging.  Maybe I should quit my daytime job to blog about traveling with my family, while giving consultation to insomniacs! :)  Hopefully, I'll still recall some of the details of the trip.

Day 3 - January 30, 2011

Today was the Sunday that we were in Cuba.  We asked the hotel staff where the closest church was, and was told that there were no churches in the Cayo Coco area, because it was a conservation area.  The closest church would be in Moron, which is a city about 50 km away from the resort area.  Since it was Sunday, there were no excursions to the city.  We would have to hire a taxi to bring us to the city, which meant we would not have a guide with us.  We weren't that adventurous, especially with Adele being there with us.  So, we had to skip mass for that week (we went to Confession once we got back).

We explored the resort a little bit and found a children's playground and a small daycare.  We went inside to look.  There was a hotel staff there, a lady named Mocha, looking after a young girl.  We chatted with her a little bit, and she was kind enough to let Adele do some watercolouring.

That afternoon, we spent some time beside the pool.  I caught up on some sleep and read a little.  I brought a book called, The Roaring Nineties by Joseph Stiglitz.  It's about the economics of the 90s, obviously.  But really, the focus was on the dotcom boom-bust, and also the corporate scandals exemplified by Worldcom, Enron, and Arthur Andersen.  Read a few chapters on the trip, but didn't get to finish it.  Still haven't...maybe I will at some point this summer.  Anyway, I digress...

So, after falling asleep by the poolside, Renee came back to me with a different daughter!  Adele had gotten dreadlocks!  While we were at the daycare, Mocha had offered to braid Adele's hair.  I didn't know about that, but Renee told me afterwards that it cost 10 pesos.  It doesn't sound like a lot, but that's more than a day's salary for the average Cuban!  It did look very cool!

Cool Dreadlocks

That evening after dinner, a band came to the hotel and played some Cuban music in the lobby.  The atmosphere was really good and there were a number of people dancing.  What caught our eyes was this huge contraption that looked like an organ, except no one was playing it.  We walked around to the back, and to our surprise, there was this man cranking a shaft that ran the instrument.  A ticker tape looking sheet was being fed into and out of the machine.  It was essentially a record and the instrument read the pattern on the tape and played the music.  It was the weirdest thing!

Cranking Out the Music (Literally)

Again, another fun day in Cuba.  Good company, good weather, ok food, and really relaxing...

Day 4 - January 31, 2011

Kayaks Were Readily Available For Us to Use

Today was our first action packed day.  In the morning, we went for an archery lesson.  It was very short; each person got to shoot about 5 arrows and that was it.  Then, we played some beach volleyball, and met a couple from Quebec.  While we were playing, a gardener gave Renee a hat made from coconut tree leaves.  They were beautifully woven.  When we gave him 2 pesos as a tip, he was so grateful.  Ever since then, he always gave us special treatment when he saw us, giving Adele grasshoppers made from the same leaves, etc.

Beautiful Hats Made From Coconut Tree Leaves

After lunch, we went to our scheduled catamaran trip.  It's not the catamaran excursion that we had booked, but simply a short ride on a catamaran.  We all wanted to go, but there were no life jackets small enough for Adele.  So, Renee and I decided to stay onshore while the rest went on the trip.  They all said that it was wise for us not to bring Adele because it was a rocky ride.  It did look very fun though.  The catamaran staff, Mike, kept offering a private excursion to the nearest town, Moron, where he lived.  He was going to charge us 40 pesos per person to bring the whole family there and also provide a lobster dinner at his house.  I believe an excursion to Moron was being charged 80 pesos per person.  It sounded like a good deal, but we decided against it, because we didn't feel 100% safe with Adele with us.  But just thinking about it, he'd make 240 pesos minus the cost of lobsters and gasoline.  The average Cuban makes a few pesos a day...wow!  He sure knows how to make money!

Johnson, Anita, Ryan, and Rachel on a Short Catamaran Trip

After coming back from the catamaran trip, we decided to stay on the beach because it was just too gorgeous.  Renee and I have always loved white sand beaches with clear water.  That was why we went to Sardinia in Italy for our honeymoon.  However, Cayo Coco just blew Sardinia away.  It was just amazing.

The resort is situated somewhat on the east side of the beach.  I think we were the second resort from the east side.  So, there was a beach on the east side of the resort and one on the west.  The one we were on today was the one on the east.  There was some shore erosion where the sea level seemed to have risen over the years and eroded away the sand.  Some of the coconut trees had fallen due to this erosion.  Nevertheless, the beach was still really beautiful.

Adele and Renee by the Beach

A Badly Stitched Photo of the Beach at Sol Cayo Coco

We swam for a little bit and then had a few burgers by the beach.  This part of the beach was pretty windy. So, we ended up going back to the resort and continued our sun tanning by the pool.  While the men sun tanned and slept, the girls went to the beach on the west side of the resort and took many pictures.  They claimed that this side was much prettier...I'll create some suspense and will post the pictures on my next post.

That evening was the beach party night that our tour operator organized for us.  We got bused to the "most beautiful beach" in the area, the Playa Pilar.  The party was a held at the outdoor bar by the beach but it was so dark by then that we couldn't really see the beauty there.  Anyway, there was a band which provided live music and an MC who taught us how to salsa.  I think I still remember the basic moves.  The dancing was pretty fun.  The night ended with a game of limbo.  There were about 30 people who played.  Ryan, Rachel and I all made it to the last 6 or 7 people.  Ryan got eliminated first and I went shortly after.  In the end, Rachel won the competition and brought home the prize...a bottle of wine!

Here's a Video of Us Limbo-ing

We got back to the hotel at around 11 pm.  Adele was really good and didn't make too big of a fuss!  Another great day in Cuba!  I'm beginning to wonder...is there a bad day in Cuba?

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